Here’s a brief recap from Season One of “The Garden” Real-Time-Strategy game:

After gathering what I deemed were ample resources, I decided to venture forth and proceeded to grow basil.  Initially, I had relatively good success, harvesting leaves for health and gaining XP through watering and pruning the plant.  Unfortunately, a neighboring clan of aphids raided my basil and cast “inedible leaf” which greatly stunted my harvest.  I tried to counter by concocting a high-level potion to repel the invading clan.  Unfortunately, I had not leveled up enough and did not pass the necessary INT check to create a proper potion.  While the resulting potion was incredibly effective against the aphid rush, it had the unwanted effect of poisoning the basil plant.  Though I made several attempts to cast “Revive,” basil ultimately suffered death.

When basil looked promising, I also planted tomato and bell pepper.  Though both grew relatively well, adding to my XP, I never was able to harvest anything that replenished hitpoints.  I cast level one “maple leaf mulch” for protection but Gaia pwn3d them both with frostwind spells.  Severely beaten by the end of season one, they barely survive to season two.

During the end of season one, with basil dead and both tomato and bell pepper in horrible shape, I was quite disheartened.  Sensing my weakness, Gaia invaded The Garden and claimed it for herself with an army of dandelions, crab grass, and three-leaf-clovers.  Thus ends Season One.  I gained a bit of XP but not enough to level up.  I gained some HP, but not enough to earn any bonus stat points.  Things looked pretty grim for The Garden, which seemed to be the perfect setup for Season Two.

Dark and starless night, weary warrior red and grey
Looking past death and decay with eyes that know the darkest mortal soul
Gliding through the hills, taking flight on borrowed quills,
The emptiness your anger fills, the wife and child that perished by your hand

Try to understand — all this hope was meant for me
How we suffered for your vanity, how I tried to set you free
You did not listen, you did not know how.  I’m afraid it’s too late now.

Dark and starless night, forger’s flames that brightly blaze
Fills the room in violet haze reflecting on the marble’s pallid hue
The past is changing you — on a field of amber grain
All your fear and all your pain are soothed by your beloved’s loving hand

Try to understand — all this hope was meant for me
How we suffered for your vanity, how I tried to set you free
You did not listen, you did not know how.  I’m afraid it’s too late now.

I always stood by you because your heart was true
And when only hope was left inside on that dark and starless night
You took your life as warriors sometimes do
But I could have told you, Kratos,
This world was never meant to have the hope you had in you.

Dark and starless night, statues stand in empty halls
Headless frames and heedless calls — a man whose sins relived with deep regret
All the souls that you had met — This vengeful god, this Spartan Ghost
Who could not wake their deep repose, could not erase the pain of long ago

I can never know what your eyes convey to me –
How Pandora offered clarity, how forgiveness set you free
All the gods are dead and the world is still –
There was one left to kill.

Endgame discussion — SPOILERS!!!

Let’s see if I can remember exactly how this all ended…

I finish the Zeus fight and go stabby stabby like a good Kratos, impaling Zeus into Gaia’s heart in a two-for-one deal.  Things fall down all around and Kratos regains consciousness next to a sword-pinned Zeus.  Kratos pulls the sword out and walks away.  We could have ended the story here and I’d have been happy.

However, Zeus goes into spirit form and goes after Mr. K — I’m asked to tap on the circle button but I die anyway.

Everything is dark and I’m suddenly playing a really really slow version of “This Is Your Life.”  Artistic storytelling recap of the previous games all the way back to Pandora, who does her Jesse Jackson impression.  After a long walk and swim, you’re back against Zeus, first-person style.  Short battle, then asked to tap circle to bash Zeus’ head in.  As Kratos pounds on Zeus’ face, the blood splatter covers the screen.  Circle button cue continues to be visible…I keep pressing circle.  Still going…and by this time I’m wondering if the game glitched on me.  The wife, who was watching this part, suggested I stop.  I do, and so does Kratos.  Yay me!  This could have been ending numero dos.

Athena shows up and asks for the power of Pandora back.  This is when we realize that when Kratos opened Pandora’s box the first time (first GOW), all the evil things within affected the gods while Kratos took ‘hope’ into himself.  It wasn’t so much vengeance as it was hope that he was drawing his determination from.  Anyway, Athena asks for the hope back.  Kratos looks at the sword says the line “my vengeance is…” [something] and stabs…himself…releasing hope into the world.  Athena goes “that was supposed to be for me!!!  they don’t know what to do with it!”  Athena walks away, credits roll.  This could have been ending numero tres.

At the end of the credits, we go back to the scene of Kratos’ suicide…except he goes Boba Fett on us by showing a blood trail all the way to the cliff-side of the mountain but no body.  No confirmed death.

Enter the potential God of War IV — “Killed ‘Em All and Back For More”

Now looking into completing the challenges, as well as starting over (probably in easy mode) to mop up some of the trophies and items that I’ve missed.  Looking at the online guides for input…it doesn’t look like I get to keep all my powers when I start over like I was able to in the prior GOW games.  Also, it appears trophies won’t be available if I turn on the bonus items.  Bummer all.  Then there are the bonus videos they supplied, which I haven’t gotten to yet.

And there you have it, my thoughts on playing God of War III.

more spoilers…

Hera’s hedge maze was well made.  It took my tired, sleep-deprived brain a while to figure that whole mess out.  Before anything else, let me take this moment to finally mention something that I seem to have failed to bring up in all my previous posts: WTF IS UP WITH THE PANDORA PLOTLINE?  I guess we’re going for the father-child angle again, and it does seem a little tacked on.  It’s like Kratos goes from vengeance-vengeance-vengeance to “save the kittens” all of a sudden.

Heph talked a lot about Pandora, and was very protective of her.  He was trying to gain Kratos’ sympathy since he can relate to having a daughter.  I thought Mr. Bad-ass was over that by now since it’s all about Zeus with him these days.  At Hera’s hedge maze, she taunts him and tries to hit him a couple of times but he wanted nothing to do with her…until she starts trashing Pandora.  Kratos gets pissed and kills Hera.  No quick-time event, no blade swinging, nothing.  Just a cutscene where Kratos kills Hera.  The body comes in handy in the puzzle room, too!

A day ago, maybe, I’ve come to realize that the game just starts throwing more enemies at you.  Many times, I’ve heard myself saying “please let that be the last of them” as I nurse my sliver of a health bar.  I mention this because the next section on the way to the labyrinth becomes a hack and slashfest.  Having to use Helios to light the way added to the immersion factor.  Seeing MANY scorpions in the distance was disheartening at times.  Hack, slash, jump — giant scorpion.  Power up that cestus, guys, the game requires you to use it.  Scorpion dies after a long dance and flying mini game.

We meet Daedalus who’s still hoping Zeus keeps his kid Icarus alive.  I could’ve sworn I killed that kid in the previous game and I have the wings to prove it…but Daedman doesn’t know that.  Twisty-turny Rubik’s Cube journey, get Pandora (who appears to be invincible, by the way).  Escort mission, break her out of a dunk tank, falling blades, a horde of enemies, etc.  At the end of it, Daedman writes you a love letter with his hands bound…he’s good.  Oh, as you’re walking, Pandora waxes poetic about her dad Heph and Kratos gets all sentimental about parenthood.  Lost somewhere in there is the fact that KRATOS JUST KILLED HEPHAESTUS A FEW SCENES AGO!!!

Time to raise the cube up to Olympus, which means hitting the three kings in the back of the head.  After fighting off numerous strong and annoying foes along the way.  Break the chain, turn a crank, cutscene of Rubik’s cube wrecking Olympus.  Now for your WTF moment: Pandora wants to jump into the flame and Kratos once more turns softie and instead wants to bake cupcakes and attend PTA meetings for Pandora.  Fight with Zeus, pandora takes the opportunity to jump into the flame.  Pandora’s box turns out to be empty.  Zeus mocks him.  Save point.

Another Zeus fight and the formerly-presumed-dead Gaia shows up.  This shows you how slow my brain had been working all this time.  In the beginning of the game one of the first real puzzles you had to solve was near her onyx-protected heart.  Having her hand chopped off like Luke and falling down the side of a mountain didn’t seem to kill her, even as Cronus lamented over her supposed death.

I start cestus-bashing the heart, Zeus shows up, fight happens, he gets all split-personality and all seven of him gang up to kill me.  Screw that, I said.  Time for bed.