Once a month, we do a refrigerator cleaning at work.  This month, our department was drafted to do the cleaning and so I volunteered to write the e-mail to staff to let them know what day it will be done.  This is what was sent…

Hello, everyone –

I hijacked the daily schedule mailing list for this important announcement:

From the creators of such cinematic classics as “The Traininator” and “Nurses With Wolves” comes a new compelling story starring YOUR FOOD.  This action-adventure tale has everything you’ve come to love in our stories: watch with excitement as we explore the depths of the refrigerator for previously undiscovered life forms.  Laugh as we attempt to identify unlabeled consumables.  Cry as you find out that we just threw away something you forgot to label and date.

It is COMEDY, it is DRAMA, it arrives THIS FRIDAY, the 29th of January:
THE REFRIGERATOR CLEANING (working title)

(label and date your food in the fridge…is what we’re trying to say)

1. Roast Beef Sandwich at The Cafe At The End Of The Universe — Though the sandwich itself was quite wonderful, it was the Douglas Adams reference that made the whole thing so much more memorable.  Pictures inside the “flipbook” section.
2. H1N1 — a week-long quarantine and the feeling that I had to ring a bell and yell “Unclean!  Unclean!” everywhere I went afterwards.
3. Prometheus — My new computer’s name.  Prometheus can be seen as both good and evil depending on the interpretation of the myth.  Prometheus dual-boots Linux and Windows.
4. Killzone 2 — a LOT of hours spent playing that game.  A LOT of swearing, too.  In descending order, my class preferences are: Sniper, Saboteur, Medic, Tactician, Engineer, Assault, Soldier.
5. “California Of The Past” summer presentation — work-related event where I met a lot of cool people, got to play with a lot of cool equipment, and learned a little bit of history along the way.  We served cake.  No lie!
6. Trip to Sacramento — work-related, #5 related event.  I realized that you haven’t gone all-out in interior decorating until you decorate the ceiling.  Pictures inside the “flipbook” section.
7. Christmas in Arizona — Always great conversations at the dinner table.  I heard the sea bass was good.  Pictures and video MIGHT be posted…provided I can get those consent forms signed.
8. A Moving Experience — we moved last September, and I’m still finding out cool things with the new place.  The cats seem to enjoy it here.
9. Pimp Hat — I got a pimp hat for Christmas…I just need to find a feather.
10. Trying to remember 10 things from 2009

Hey there!

Just thought I’d stop by and say hello. I was listening to Tori Amos’ “Digital Ghost” and something clicked in my head to come in and check the place out. Quite apparent is that a lot of things have changed, but I do see bits and pieces of the familiar. We still have a few things in common.

The pen is different, but the fire is still there…so obviously, I’m not quite dead. Especially not today, old friend.

— Silence

A warm wind blew across the desert as a battle raged in the distance.  I heard explosions along with faint muzzle flashes out there where my brothers fought.  The communications radio brought many things — battle orders, a momentary celebration, a desperate call for a medic, a soldier calling out enemy positions.  I got to take it all in from afar.

Through my scope I saw you setting an ambush.  From behind cover you looked around.  “They’re not here yet,” you must have thought to yourself.  I saw a soldier, a warrior, a man with family and friends.  I saw a loved-one’s picture in your pocket.  I saw a common bond — a worn-out man longing for the comforts of home, longing for a warm meal, longing for peace.

In many ways, we were kindred, like others who had come before.  We both had jobs to do, duties to perform, orders to follow.  You sought to kill my brothers while I sought to protect them.  I know it was more complex than that, that war is not black and white but shades of gray.  We all have to live with the things we have seen and done.  Well, at least I do.  I saw your eyes widen when you heard the gunshot.  It was an honor to have met you in combat.