17
Jun

The Garden [RTS] Update

   Posted by: Allan   in Prose, The Garden [RTS]

The troops have gained strength. Perhaps they have gained too much strength. The Garden is quickly transforming into a jungle with tomato vines growing defiantly out of control and zucchini leaves at the end of hollow stems stretching out beyond their barracks.

The General was faced with the classic philosophical question posed upon any virtuous leader: Which is better, to be loved or feared? As Machiavelli once wrote, while being both would be most desirable, if one must choose, the virtuous leader should choose being feared.

With the aid of pruning shears, the benevolent General attempted to strike a balance between discipline and harm. At times, young fruits had been lost and vines had been bent. While the General grieved each loss, he understood that ultimate success demanded that order and discipline be maintained.

Since the season started, a total of five zucchini have been harvested. A larger number had died before their time. Tomatoes have not yet ripened, but are ever so slowly changing color as the days go by. Basil had been aggressively pruned, yielding a large jar of a potable potion vaguely resembling pesto. Though delighted at the harvest, the General wished he invested more skill points into potion mastery.

Having unexpectedly gained skill points in necromancy, the General’s undead troops from season one continued to display growth. Season one’s tomato actually required a well-placed stake to encourage proper behavior. Although the first bell pepper fruit never did grow to maturity, the plant seems to continue producing flowers.

Six spicy but currently unidentified peppers have joined the ranks in The Garden. They came as a team with different personalities and a group photo for an ID. A few have shown fruit, but not enough to properly identify them from the photograph.

Helios has continued to gain strength while Gaia weakens. Though both situations were anticipated, the General was surprised by the number of times he has had to cast Poseidon’s Aid to combat the increased effects of Solar Gaze.

At this time, The Garden is green. The troops are filled with potential and zeal. Harvest seems closer. The General is cautiously hopeful.

12
Jun

Dungeons and Dragons Online N00B Headphone Chatter

   Posted by: Allan   in Games, Prose

Real conversation snippets from D&D Online…

“Damn it, my staff is broken!”
“uh huh huh…you broke your staff.”

“I’ll get to try out my new sword. You know, this is the only place you can say that and have it be socially acceptable.”

“Alright, undead! I can control undead! Wait, what? Where the hell do I find an eyelash in gum Arabic? Awww crap.”

“I think I found the guy we’re supposed to kill.”
“I’ll be right there.”
“Watch out, I’m already dead.”
“Oh…me too. Yeah, it’s a level four quest and we’re level three.”
“Ok, well that explains that.”

“Have you seen my dog? Did it follow us through the door?”
“No, I think he’s gone.”
“Damn it, Snoop. Meh, I’ll make a new one.”

“Did you just revive me? How the hell do you do that?”
“I have no idea.”

“Wolves up ahead.”
“Go get ‘em, Snoop! Uh huh huh, dog on dog action.”
“Bitch fight!”

“Nope, I didn’t find anything.”
“Secret door right in front of you.”
“Stupid elf and your search skills.”

“Ahh, spider on my keyboard…in real life. Hold on a sec.”

(on being poisoned by a spider)
“Hey you’ve got the Ultimate Warrior logo on top of your head!”

“How many potions do you have left?”
“I’ve got 10, but as a wizard with a drinking problem, that’ll go by fast.”

6
Jun

The Garden [RTS] pics (6/6/2010)

   Posted by: Allan   in The Garden [RTS]

17
May

A Video Greeting On Your Graduation

   Posted by: Allan   in Videos

…as only an older brother can deliver.


17
May

The Garden [RTS] Season Two – A New Hope

   Posted by: Allan   in Prose, The Garden [RTS]

At the beginning of season two, the returning cast surprised me with their determination to survive. Even more surprising at this point is that the bell pepper is attempting to bear fruit. Too small and undeveloped for harvest, it has yet to meet its potential. Tomato from season one has also flowered, but no fruit as of yet. However, the mere act of trying to be effective in combat even after sustaining what could be considered life-threatening injuries makes me proud to have bell pepper and tomato as warriors loyal to my cause.

I have harvested from basil and rosemary numerous times, gaining decent XP and HP. The strategic placement of wood mulch proved to be a misguided error as a swarm of fungus gnats have set up camp right at the base of both plants. Attacks with insecticidal soap have thinned their numbers but it appears that the insects are heavily entrenched and that I may have to resort to higher levels of biological warfare if I want to win the war.

With Helios’ influence growing stronger, the new recruits for season two seem to thrive with his aid. The zucchinis which were started from seed have now flowered. Using hand-pollinating techniques gleaned from seeking and reading scrolls, at least one more zucchini is ready for harvest.

The tomatoes from season two have also shown promising developments. Each of them appears to have at least one fruit in the process of growth. While momentary triumph seems imminent, I constantly remind myself that a crucial mistake on my part or any unprovoked attacks from either Helios or Gaia can easily swing the tide of battle. A bountiful harvest is in no way assured.

As Helios’ “Solar Gaze” seems to have leveled up, much to the delight of most of my soldiers, it has left bibb lettuce wanting cooler climes. While two of the six were successfully sacrificed for the greater glory of the cause, providing for a week or so worth of salad greens and contributing to both XP and HP, the four that were left behind are not in good shape. Torn up by insects and unable to withstand the powered up Solar Gaze spells, their future seems more grim than the fruiting plants.

An experiment with chives has yielded mixed results. The seeds have sprouted but the seedlings have not manifested enough strength and growth to merit transplanting. A batch of bell pepper seeds have yet to break ground and reach for the skies. It was my hope that these bell peppers would have grown enough to transplant into a waiting row by now. It seems the row will have to stay empty for a bit longer.

A few months into season two and The Garden seems well. While there have been a few setbacks and some battles yet to be won, the troops are strong and the promise of a good harvest seems so close. I hope that the soldiers continue to react positively to Solar Gaze. I know Helios will only grow stronger as the season progresses.

The marigolds seem to be doing alright but I may have placed them too far from the effective range of their mythical insect-repelling capabilities. As such, they stand watch for Gaia’s advance. Reports from the front lines have indicated that her troops are getting weaker…